Week 17 : Things are a changing

These last few weeks have been pretty emotional for me. My hormones or what I like to call horrormones, have been crazy this last few weeks. At the drop of a hat I began to cry or start yelling and cussing out the roll of Saran wrap which I always end up hulking it in to a wall and walking out of the room yelling about how everything sucks. Or, I end up screaming and yelling about the stupid idiots who made it a policy to FREEZE cool whip! HONESTLY! Its hydrogenated oil! There is not one thing in it that could make it ever go rancid. So WHY IN THE HELL is it frozen?! All I want is to buy it and come home and make Pistachio Delight minus the marshmallows- yuck!  But can I? NO! I have to wait at least an hour for the crap to defrost. It's Stupid!

I can't even watch TV without a Publix commercial making me cry for hours. Thank God we don't get the Hallmark channel on our dish network! And don't even get me started on TLC and their horror birth storys. I find myself yelling at the TV . Not because the women have no idea about the process of birth or that most of them have an induction at 38-39 weeks saying that they DO NOT want a C-section. And, guess what? They always have a C-section. Gee, I wonder why? Anyway, I yell because these women are just a product of the maternity system in America. It's sad and at the same time infuriating. I just can't do it!

On a happy note this little baby is sure is moving around a lot, kicking and tumbling around in my Cantaloupe size uterus. I can feel his or hers tiny little feet pressing against my uterine wall. I feel Oxytiocin surge my body every time it happens. I also find that its so easy to talk to this little one. With Niko I found it weird and uncomfortable. Maybe, with this one I know it real.

My last week prenatal went well. I just have to say I LOVE having a midwife! To be honest I really wonder how women feel having an OB. Do they get the same connection and bond that I have with my Midwife? My appointments are an hour to an hour and a half long and It's always with the same midwife, well, once I saw the other Midwife because my Midwife had something come up. But that was okay, because I know her as well so talking to her was very easy. But, my Midwife knows everything about my life, my past, my fears, my wants, and my husbands as well. When my test results come in  or something comes up she herself calls me not a nurse or receptionist. I know that she will be at my birth and I don't have to schedule my birth around her schedule. That she will be with me the whole time during my birth, holding my hand or in the next room if I need some privacy but always close enough if I need her. Do women have that with an OB? I have had clients who only saw there OB once while pregnant and then didn't even have that OB when they went into labor. Sometimes they haven't even met  the OB delivering their before. And a the average length of a OB's appointment is 6-10mins. how can they know YOU in that short of time?  That just seems weird to me. I want to know everyone who will be at the birth of my child. I only will  get  to have this experience once and give birth- if I am lucky a few times in my life. I want it to be surrounded by support and trust not by policies and strangers telling me I can't do something or about their births and life, trying to persuade me to veer off my birth plan. Which always seems to happen with the hospital births I have attended. Thank god most woman don't pick up on whats happening or remember. But, I do! Even with my first birth I remember the sly comments. Now, don't get me wrong ! You can have a peaceful birth in a hospital but it takes a LOT of work ,fighting, demanding, and yes, a bit a luck as well. My point is, its very different with a Midwife. And I wonder if they knew the difference would they feel like they were gipped? I love my OB but when I go to my midwife for a pap smear the appointment is just so different then when I go to my OB so, I can only imagine the difference when it comes to pregnancy .

Well, the the baby's heart beat was in the 150s and by the old Wives tale, it's a girl. Traditionally, the theory is that a heart rate above 140 is a girl, below 140 is a boy.  However, the old theory doesn't take into account that heart rate varies over the duration of pregnancy. So, we will have to wait in see! Mike is hell-bent that we are having a sweet little girl. I, on the other hand believe its another boy.  Well, one of us will be right.


We have our Ultra Sound tomorrow night at 6pm. We still are not finding out the gender of Higlet. But, there is something wonderful about self torture. :-)

Niko is becoming more and more interested in my growing belly. Rubs my belly and kisses the baby. I can't wait until tomorrow when he sees the Ultra Sound of the baby on the monitor. It will be a wonderful experience for us as a family. I will post the pics tomorrow.

This is a picture I found of my mom pregnant with me.

Year 1982.